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Girlfriend gets Pwn3D

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Old 08-30-2004, 11:45 PM
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One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,big unnamed dept. store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets geta pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry dept. where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for awhile... You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
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Old 08-30-2004, 11:52 PM
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hahaha

i don't think youre having sex for quite a while....least not with her anyways
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Old 08-30-2004, 11:54 PM
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You may as well have castrated youself dude!!LOL
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Old 08-31-2004, 12:12 AM
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Oh this is tottally not me. I got it off another forum. I would have killed myself after saying that to a girlfriend. No more sex for ever.
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Old 08-31-2004, 12:16 AM
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haha nice, harsh but nice lol....but just think if you did go through with it you could be happy man! lol...

[ August 31, 2004, 01:17 AM: Message edited by: ChizzerZ24 ]
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Old 08-31-2004, 12:33 AM
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Brilliant!

[ August 31, 2004, 02:53 AM: Message edited by: Mike MacAwesome ]
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Old 08-31-2004, 12:37 AM
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lol i've heard that before itz still just as funny [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img]
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Old 08-31-2004, 05:10 AM
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sad, but true
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Old 08-31-2004, 01:19 PM
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PERFECT !
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Old 09-02-2004, 01:17 AM
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Originally posted by D-50Truck:
Oh this is tottally not me. I got it off another forum. I would have killed myself after saying that to a girlfriend. No more sex for ever.
LMAO...i was thinking this was you in the story [img]graemlins/beer.gif[/img]
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